The Feedback That Still Trains Me

I still remember it vividly. A senior leader once told me, “You train people brilliantly, but you don’t always let them see you being trained by life.”

At first, I didn’t get it. I thought leadership was about knowing, not noticing.

About performing confidence, not practising curiosity. Back then, I was training young, multicultural resort teams in the Maldives, driven, eager, and determined to prove myself.

Every session had to be perfect. Slides immaculate. Energy high. Timings precise.

People saw structure, but not struggle.

They saw confidence, but not curiosity.

Years later, when I moved into luxury cruise lines, training officers and crew from over 50 nationalities—I finally understood what that leader meant.

People don’t follow the trainer in you.

They follow the learner in you.

The most impactful sessions weren’t the ones where I spoke the most, but where I listened the deepest.

Where a question replaced a statement.

Where a story replaced a slide.

That’s when training stopped being an event, and became a connection.

Then came the pandemic. The world slowed down, but the pressure didn’t.

 I transitioned into a land-based hospitality environment where I began noticing something that data never captured, brilliant, hardworking employees silently battling exhaustion, anxiety, and isolation.

Mental health wasn’t a discussion point. It was a silent epidemic unfolding behind smiles and uniforms. That old piece of feedback returned with new meaning. It wasn’t about being a better trainer anymore. It was about being a more attuned human being.

That realization led me to create the company’s first-ever Employee Assistance Program, not as a corporate initiative, but as a bridge between performance and presence. Between what people deliver, and what they silently carry.

That one line from years ago became the compass for every leadership decision since.

Because feedback that unsettles you is usually the one that transforms you.

It reveals not what you’re doing wrong—but what you’ve stopped noticing.

If you lead teams today—whether on land, at sea, or anywhere in between, remember this:

Your expertise earns respect.

Your empathy earns trust.

And in leadership, trust will always be the higher currency. That one piece of feedback didn’t just change my career.

It changed how I show up in every room since.

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